There has been a lot more attention around UHNW household roles in the media recently and it has really made me think about how concerning it is that so many people seem to be drawn to these roles for the wrong reasons. While many of these points can also apply to HNW households, UHNW roles in particular seem to be getting more attention online because of the salaries, travel and lifestyle that can come with them. I completely understand that the salary can be attractive and there is nothing wrong with wanting to be paid well for the work you do. These roles can be incredibly demanding and often come with long hours, travel and a lot of responsibility. What worries me is when the money, lifestyle or status starts to become more important than the actual job. Working in a private household is a professional career. It takes experience, patience, good judgement and genuine care for the principal or family.
It is also worth saying that these roles can be very hard work. The hours can be long, expectations can be high and you may need to be flexible, discreet and switched on for most of the day. Travel can sound exciting, but travelling for work is very different from going on holiday. You are still working, often in unfamiliar environments and sometimes with very little downtime. A high salary often reflects the level of responsibility, flexibility and pressure that comes with the role.
One thing that has changed significantly in recent years is how private household work is portrayed online. There are now more people sharing their experiences of working for UHNW families, sometimes focusing heavily on the travel, luxury homes, perks and lifestyle that can come with these roles. There is nothing wrong with talking about your career or sharing general experiences, but discretion is such a big part of private household work. Families are trusting staff with access to their homes, routines and personal lives and that trust should not be taken lightly. Posting too much about where you work, who you work for, the places you travel to or details about a household can quickly cross a professional boundary. Even when names are not mentioned, it can sometimes be surprisingly easy to identify a family from what is being shared.
A strong social media presence can be a positive thing, but if you are sharing too much about the household or the family’s lifestyle, I think employers may start to question how discreet you really are. Discretion is not only about what you post about the family either. I also think private household staff need to be mindful of how much of their own lives they share publicly online. You do not need to disappear from social media completely, but keeping personal accounts private and being careful about what you share can be a sensible approach. Discretion also goes beyond social media. It is about how you speak about the family, what you share with friends and how you conduct yourself outside the household. When you work in someone’s private home, you often have access to information and situations that most people would never see. Knowing what should stay private is a huge part of the job.
Working within a UHNW household can come with incredible opportunities, but those opportunities are part of the job, not content to be shared. Being able to enjoy those experiences while still protecting the privacy of the family is a huge part of professionalism in private service. It is also important to remember that not every UHNW household will be the right fit for every member of staff. The salary or title might look impressive, but if the working style, expectations or values do not suit you, it can quickly become a difficult role. Sometimes the best job is not the one with the highest salary, but the one where you feel respected, trusted and able to do your job well. For anyone considering these roles because of what they have seen online, it is worth remembering that the reality is usually very different from the highlight reel. A high salary or exciting lifestyle does not automatically make a role a good one. The family, how you are treated, what is expected of you and whether you actually feel comfortable in the role matter far more than the UHNW label.
Rosie - Private Staff Life